Reaching Out

TCU Foundation Awards$10,000 Grant

In July of 2001 Home Management Resources received a $5000 grant from Teachers Credit Union for program underwriting. We were also given the opportunity to participate in the TCU Member Matching Gift program. As part of the Matching Gift program, we were challenged to receive $5,000 in donations between October of 2001 and February 28, 2002. Contributions made to Home Management Resources by TCU members of $10 to $250 were matched by the TCU Foundation up to a maximum of $5,000. Thanks to all who responded we met our match! Your donations totaled $5,000 and the TCU Foundation matched it dollar for dollar: a total earned for Home Management Resources of $10,000!

Are you a graduate or counselor of Home Management Resources? If you are, you're now eligible for membership at TCU! That's right! Any graduate of the Home Management 'Family Life Seminar' and any Home Management counselor can now become a member of Teachers Credit Union and begin taking advantage of TCU services.

It's easy! Simply stop by the Home Management Resources office to pick up your membership letter. Any TCU branch office will be happy to open your new account.

110 S. Main Street
823 E. Jefferson Blvd.
2702 Lincolnway West
1903 Ireland Road
133 E. McKinley Ave., Mish
346 W. Cleveland Road, Granger

As a member of Teachers Credit Union you and your family members may benefit from TCU's financial products and services, including everything from financing (or refinancing) your vehicle or your home, to low-rate credit cards and personal loans, and from money-market accounts to planning for retirement.

JOIN TODAY !

A Fitting Dowry

A book I recently read, A Feather on the Breath of God, is a story about a woman who grew up in a housing project in New York, as the daughter of unhappy immigrant parents. Her Chinese father rarely spoke, her German mother hated her marriage and life in the United States. As the daughter, Christa, who was never acknowledged or loved by her father, and never accepted by her critical mother, described her feelings about marriage.

"I do not think it can be possible that I never dreamed of marriage. But if I did, that dream died early and left no trace. What stayed with me was a horror of marriage… I saw no happy marriages when I was growing up… outside of television…Wives and husbands forever at each other's throats, and children overwhelmed. Maybe they could fool themselves but they couldn't fool the kids…"

That narrative sequence brought to mind a conversation I had with one of our students awhile back. This mother had several children, each with a different father. Her life was bleak to say the least. When I asked her why she had never married, her answer was emphatic. "I'm afraid to get married! It might end up like the home I grew up in, and I don't want my children to go through what I did with parents screaming and fighting all the time."

It's not hard to understand why people who have grown up in an atmosphere of hostility and bitter confrontations abhor the thought of marriage. Homes like this spawn a type of generational misery, inherited from unhappy parents and given as a dowry to the children to be passed down to their children. When the choice becomes either living together in constant warfare or separating to create another single parent family; we perpetuate the cycle of passing on a flawed and sad legacy to our children. There are serious reasons for separating in some cases, and a single parent household that is peaceful and nurturing is far superior to a two-parent one ruled by fear and intimidation. But for too many couples today, divorce is the option of choice (50%) instead of learning how to live together in peace. Some of the instruction given in the "Family Life Seminar" deals directly with this aspect of building strong, committed relationships.

We did some research last summer that shed light on general statistics of children who grow up in single parent families. It's worth noting and reflecting upon as we work to build a community that supports strong family life. These children are twice as likely to become pregnant as teenagers, to use drugs, drop out of school, and be abused or neglected. This is most true of children whose parents are addicted to alcohol or drugs. Overall, the likelihood of children living in poverty is greatly increased in single parent homes.

The enormous stress of raising children alone, without the daily support of the other parent, takes its toll from single parents. They, and their married counterparts in stressful living situations, need instruction in how to navigate their way through the unknown waters of parenting and household management. They also need support, mentoring and assistance, not just from Home Management Resources, but from family, church, community and friends, in order to provide a consistently nurturing environment for their children.

Twenty seven percent of our students at Home Management Resources are single-parent mothers. Almost all of them are heroic in the sacrifices they make for their kids. They are loving, hard working women who are willing to do anything it takes to make their homes as nurturing as possible. They come to classes, return for specialized workshops, and deeply appreciate the instruction, mentoring and assistance they receive from Home Management Resources.

Grateful Home Management Resources graduates of the Family Life Seminar continually tell us that there is a noticeable difference in the level of peace in their homes, and much less stress. In the context of weekly family meetings, they work through things, together, as a family. Through delegation, the family begins to function as a team. Their methods of discipline and correction are more positive and thoughtful. And most of all, they've come to understand the impact their behavior has in the formation of their children. The job of a mother is very important. It's a job that requires a lot of courage, and a lot of skill.

We have been given the privilege of interfacing with parents on the front line of their challenges. The role of Home Management Resources is unique in our community. We affect the most fundamental unit of our society - the family - and ultimately, the future of our children and their children's children. It is a fitting dowry for a community that is working to become the healthiest in the nation by 2010.

Happy Mothers' Day everyone.

God bless you.

Gwen

FUNDING CORNER

General Donations
Julie Cirillo
First Presbyterian Church
Robert Firth
New Media Design, Bill Herman
Timothy and Martha Onkka
Chuck and Denise Roemer
Christine Urbanski

Birthday Gifts
Anonymous
Lynn Carrington
Tom and Margaret Clare
Marge Connolly
Don and Pat Cressy
Birdie Designs
Mark and Michelle Hamilton
Noreen Howard
RaeLee Hudson
Keith and Patti Kondratko
Della Kowalski
Louis and Mary La Pierre
Bea Lumma
Steve and Debra Marino
Martha Merritt
Mary Ann Matthews
Dennis and Kathleen Miller
Hope Rescue Mission
Mary Norman
Carol Sanner
Ron and Ruthanne Seitz
Elwood and Linda Smith
Lucille Sneed
Abbie Teeter
Stephen Wallisch
Mark and Barbara Whalen
Bill and Ann Zimmer

Memorials

In memory of Marie E. Kiley

Given By:
Phillip and Kathleen R. Bornemann
William and Rosella Cressy
Jim and Chris Coleman
Barbara A. Crighton
Matt and Susan Mayer
John and Zenobia Migas
W.S. and Hildegard Mueller
Phyllis Rozanski
St. Margaret Mercy Health Care Centers
Sisters of St. Francis Health Services
Philip and Sandra Vitale

Ruthanne Seitz Joins Staff
A Woman of Inspiration

Ruthanne Seitz has been a counselor with Home Management Resources for 13 years, having been trained in the first evening counselor training class. Ruthanne taught on the evening Family Life Seminar teaching team for several years. She has also been instrumental behind the scenes serving on several different working committees for Home Management Resources. "I have just been happy to help Home Management Resources in whatever capacity time allowed," comments Ruthanne.

"I've always had a special place in my heart for Home Management Resources and helping others find their way to a peaceful, orderly life, says Ruthanne. I had so much to share from my own life experiences. I could empathize with the students and show them, "I made it, you can too!", and pass on to them the support I received in tough times."

Ruthanne's calm, even personality is a source of inspiration to those who get to know her. She is a wonderful role model for all women. Ruthanne raised five children, two of whom were adopted and was a foster parent to 22 newborns. In 1989, her husband Dick Zuber died suddenly. "Becoming a single parent gave me new insight into the challenges entailed in facing each day alone, relates Ruthanne. Life is very different for single parent families." In 1992 Ruthanne married Ron Seitz, a Lutheran pastor, whom she credits with being a bridge into the life ahead of her.

This year things changed for Ruthanne again. After 20 years Ruthanne left her job to accept the position of Outreach Coordinator with Home Management Resources. "I am living my dream: Working each day to help bring into reality the Home Management motto, "strong families make strong communities," says Ruthanne.

"In my position as Outreach Coordinator I am working on curriculum development for our 'New Beginnings' programming, to serve people in crisis. I will also help develop and oversee off-site programming; regionally and nationally. In order to fund all of this, I will be involved in grant writing for new program development."

"Home Management Resources is a brave organization changing the world one person at a time, and I am proud to be part of this gallant work."

SPEAKING OUT

Happy Mothers' Day! How are you celebrating the awesome accomplishment and responsibility of guiding your child into an individual who confronts all that life throws him with total confidence? Do you take care of you . . . as much as you take care of others?

Take time out for you! Here are some tips.

• Tonight, put the kids to bed on time and take a nice long bubble bath, with lighted candles around the tub and calming music that soothes the soul.
  
  
• A friend of Home Management recently shared with me that once a month she gets with her "sisters" and they spend the evening just talking, laughing and being women. Last month they rented a room at a local hotel (sharing the cost) and had a slumber party. They did facials, manicures, and hair styles. This didn't require leaving the city; wasn't very expensive and their children were well cared for by their dads or other family member. The next morning they enjoyed a continental breakfast and returned home renewed.
  
  

Value yourself by investing in your own development as a person.

By Dorothy Clark
Program Director

MOVING?

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